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Conversations from the Heart

#38 - How to Navigate Complex Family Dynamics by Checking for Alignment

April 18, 2024 Yvette Erasmus Season 1 Episode 38
#38 - How to Navigate Complex Family Dynamics by Checking for Alignment
Conversations from the Heart
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Conversations from the Heart
#38 - How to Navigate Complex Family Dynamics by Checking for Alignment
Apr 18, 2024 Season 1 Episode 38
Yvette Erasmus

This week's episode focuses on how to navigate complex family dynamics - especially when what has previously worked is no longer sustainable.

A common theme on this week's podcast is the importance of checking for alignment.  If we're aligned in our needs and our wishes, then designing strategies to meet our goals is easier.

In question number one, a caller is rediscovering his sense of self and discovering the language needed in order to set new boundaries around old family dynamics.  

Today's second caller longs for a deeper relationship with his adult son and we explore strategies to reconnect with someone who's choosing to stay distant.  

If you're struggling with how to align with family members and reclaim your own boundaries and values in complex family dynamics, then this episode is for you!

We explore:

  • 2:08  How do I stay true to what I need and stay connected with my family?
  • 6:23  Avoid parenting your spouse.
  • 9:48  "I had this delusion that my flexibility was building up some kind of credit."
  • 15:20  A script to help check for alignment of family goals
  • 24:34  How to pick up what the other person is saying so they feel heard
  • 26:54  My eldest child doesn't speak to me.  How can I change that?
  • 28:21  A script for inviting connection 
  • 31:23  How to better attune to your adult child
  • 35:11  A script to check for alignment 
  • 36:53  There's no such thing as a bad parent
  • 41:18  How to listen to your child's feelings and needs without taking it personally
  • 49:48 Three nuggets from The Boundaries Masterclass 


The end of today's episode features a brief discussion of The Boundaries Masterclass, one of Yvette's available online courses.  Feel free to check it out!

—

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Show Notes

This week's episode focuses on how to navigate complex family dynamics - especially when what has previously worked is no longer sustainable.

A common theme on this week's podcast is the importance of checking for alignment.  If we're aligned in our needs and our wishes, then designing strategies to meet our goals is easier.

In question number one, a caller is rediscovering his sense of self and discovering the language needed in order to set new boundaries around old family dynamics.  

Today's second caller longs for a deeper relationship with his adult son and we explore strategies to reconnect with someone who's choosing to stay distant.  

If you're struggling with how to align with family members and reclaim your own boundaries and values in complex family dynamics, then this episode is for you!

We explore:

  • 2:08  How do I stay true to what I need and stay connected with my family?
  • 6:23  Avoid parenting your spouse.
  • 9:48  "I had this delusion that my flexibility was building up some kind of credit."
  • 15:20  A script to help check for alignment of family goals
  • 24:34  How to pick up what the other person is saying so they feel heard
  • 26:54  My eldest child doesn't speak to me.  How can I change that?
  • 28:21  A script for inviting connection 
  • 31:23  How to better attune to your adult child
  • 35:11  A script to check for alignment 
  • 36:53  There's no such thing as a bad parent
  • 41:18  How to listen to your child's feelings and needs without taking it personally
  • 49:48 Three nuggets from The Boundaries Masterclass 


The end of today's episode features a brief discussion of The Boundaries Masterclass, one of Yvette's available online courses.  Feel free to check it out!

—

Thank you for tuning in. Remember to subscribe so you get notified when I publish an episode weekly.

Here are more ways to connect with me: