Conversations from the Heart
A weekly, soul-nourishing podcast offering psychologically grounded, heart-centered reflections on human relationships, inner healing, and compassion-based communication.
Focused on live mini-coaching moments to help callers shift from reactive, domination-based communication to collaborative, heart-centered connection. Listen for new scripts for stuck situations, new ways of responding to old relationship dynamics and guidance on how to approach these situations with empathy, self-awareness, and effective communication strategies. Here, we emphasize understanding both one's own needs and the needs of others, creating safe spaces for vulnerable conversations, and finding ways to express ourselves authentically while respecting others' boundaries.
Conversations from the Heart
#76 - How to Melt Defensiveness
In this episode, we tackle one of the most challenging aspects of communication: defensiveness. Whether it’s a friend who dismisses others, a family member who reacts sharply, or a coworker who resists feedback, defensiveness often creates distance in relationships. But what if we could work with defensiveness instead of resisting or judging it?
Drawing from real-life listener questions, I explore how to engage with others’ defenses in ways that foster trust, empathy, and connection. Together, we’ll uncover why defensiveness arises, how to approach it with curiosity, and the surprising ways it can become a bridge rather than a barrier. If you’ve ever struggled with someone’s resistance—or your own—this episode is for you. We listen to three different scenarios that can be turned around with the use of really clear requests.
We discuss:
- 1:00 My friend is so judgmental of my other friends. How can I talk to her about this?
- 6:00 Why clear requests are so essential.
- 9:49 Want to experience more care? Try this move.
- 11:39 Leading with curiosity
- 19:44 Working with others' defenses.
- 20:57 How can I warm the relationship I have with my daughter?
- 29:07 How can I request an invitation to dinner?
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